Los Angeles Times columnist Steve Lopez, who may or may not be joking when he writes that "the more I see Meg Whitman in action, the more I find myself rooting for her to become the next governor of California," has engaged a polygraph expert to administer the lie detector test Meg Whitman says she’ll take to prove she’s telling the truth — whatever today’s truth is — about her hiring, and firing, of her Mexican housekeeper Nicandra Diaz Santillan. Pop yer popcorn, folks.
Whitman, who opposes a path to legalization for the millions of people in this country cleaning houses like hers, said at a news conference that Diaz Santillan not only lied to her, but she broke the law. If she feels so strongly about it, then why didn’t Whitman report her?
Could it be because Whitman understands the complexities of the immigration debate, even if she doesn’t have the political courage to discuss them? Yes, the housekeeper lied, and helped create her own nightmare. But Whitman missed a chance to say she’ll lead the call for sweeping immigration reform, given the lessons of the illegal immigrant who took care of her family for nine years.
Yes, this was a chance for Meg to seize the opportunity to do, and say, the right thing about immigration reform, having demonized immigrants and those who hire them by backing Arizona’s punitive law during the GOP primary this spring.
Instead we had Whitman pointing fingers and offering to take a lie detector test, and it occurred to me that four years of Meg-alomaniac (as reader John McCumber called her in a letter to the editor last week) as governor might help me get over the loss of Arnold Schwarzenegger. So I got hold of John Grogan, a Los Angeles private investigator who has conducted thousands of polygraph tests. And he happens to have been following local political news.
"Oh, sure. I’ll test Meg Whitman for you," Grogan said before I even explained what I was calling about.
Grogan said he would ask questions such as:
"Did you know she was an illegal alien prior to whatever date?" and, "Were you aware of that letter from Social Security?"
I’ve already left word with Whitman’s people.
Come on, Meg, you said you’d do it. For your sake, let me help.
Let Lopez help, Meg. It sounds like he really wants to help you out.