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Pam needs Jesus, when Pam meets the Lord that yearning for a member of the same sex will change…she’d probably make a fantastic mother, and would enjoy having a husband who was born male – no Chaz Bono business – born male – and meet her man, and rock her world, in the name of the Lord.”
– Rev. Patrick Wooden, Amendment One supporter, in an interview with professional anti-gay Peter LaBarbera giving unsolicited advice to your blogmistress of perversion.
These guys are a regular Dear Abby column for the misguided homosexual, aren’t they? Peter LaBarbera has made a career out of playing the pious, family-focused anti-gay activist at the grade Z level, all while trolling going “undercover” to research what he believes is mainstream gay society at events like International Mr. Leather, and S&M culture events that plenty of heterosexuals also attend (his skills of observation must be pretty weak).
When those excursions failed to bring in enough dough from conservative little old ladies on Social Security, he found a new gravy train — hooking up (not literally, of course) as other white social conservative anti-gays-for-pay have done, is to trot out groups of rent-a-black pastors to hold sad little press conferences, ostensibly to say “look, we’re not bigots, here are men of God who think you all are diseased/pathological/perverted sinners who don’t deserve civil rights either….AND OUR PEEPS ARE BLACK.”
Enter one Rev. Patrick Wooden, the latest minister to pimp himself to Jesus the professional anti-gay set. He has been hard at work trying to deny LGBT residents in the state of North Carolina any kind of civil rights protections by conflating church and state matters. Actually, it’s worse than that. While he parrots the usual bible-beating lines, he seems to have spent most of the time in the past week displaying his, um, deep interest in unusual purported sex acts (gay men using iPhones, gerbils, etc. as sex toys) that makes you wonder what his sermons must be like (or based on).
As a pastor flavor of the day — after all NC is a swing state with a marriage discrimination amendment on the ballot May 8, and Charlotte will host the Dem Convention this year — it’s pretty clear that Wooden is basking in the PR limelight at the moment. In his second interview with Peter LaBarbera, they decided to spend/waste time on the air bloviating with false concern about my sex life and reproductive plans/parenting skills, as well as saving my soul.
Not only is this ridiculous, but it’s pretty creepy if you ask me. If I were a paranoid person or living in a country where government and cultural oppression of the lesbian community is violent, I’d think these two are advocating for corrective rape, based on their “friendly talk.” But 1) I am not paranoid, and 2) these clowns are sick, but harmless from that perspective. What they say in the following interview is absurd, condescending and insulting on a personal level (my wife Kate just shook her head when I told her about this bullsh*t), given I currently am denied myriad civil rights in North Carolina that Wooden, as a heterosexual fellow resident, can take for granted.
So let’s go to the audiotape…a hat tip to People for the American Way’s Right Wing Watch for sending me the portion of the interview where “Diaper Pastor” Wooden and The Peter hangout their life advice desk sign for me.
[The transcript is below the fold.]
To continue to focus on “Jesus” and “God” as a battering ram about civil law is purposefully ignorant and a distraction. They know full well civil marriage has nothing to do with religious marriage, and certainly that perversion, sex acts (in particular, focusing on the anus) have nothing to do with being able to have gay and lesbian relationships legally recognized under state law. The amendment NC residents will vote on will not just “protect marriage” from gays — it will deny any legal recognition whatsoever, removing any existing domestic partnerships that already exist in some municipalities.
It’s offensive for Wooden and LaBarbera to toss religion around in this manner (as well as these other fundies do). The assumption is that everyone out there is 1) a Christian; 2) a believer; 3) a Christian that reads and interprets the Bible as they do; 3) too stupid to understand that a personal aversion to homosexuality because of personal issues has no bearing on whether to deny anyone civil rights. We went through that already with interracial marriage. I’m very tired of having to hear bigots like LaBarbera and Wooden share this kind of “love” with a smile — and a dagger poised over LGBTs’ backs.
The transcript:
Peter LaBarbera: According to the left you are a rent-a-pastor, I’m referring to a comment made by Pam Spaulding, a lesbian activist in your state. She does not have kind words for you Patrick. She calls you a bigot, and when she found out that you were appearing at our press conference and said you were among the so-called rent-a-pastors. So she was echoing the same sort of stuff we’ve caught by the SPLC [Southern Poverty Law Center], which to reiterate and remind people that they said the white organizers…which I suppose would be Peter LaBarbera and Matt Barber. We brought along a set of black pastors. So Pam, who happens to be black, she also called you a rent-a-pastor. So how do you feel about that?
Patrick Wooden: Well, first of all, I love Pam, and one of these days I hope to invite Pam Spaulding maybe to lunch, and we can sit down and talk, I have never had the privilege of meeting her. I learned that we were at an event one time together and she did not make herself known [news to me; what event is he talking about?] and of course she knew, if my information is correct, she’s aware of who I am and I did not know her. I love her and I am praying for her, and I wouldn’t dare rail insults for insults or slurs for slurs.
I will say that Christ died for Pam, and Jesus will save her and deliver her from sin and that I have nothing but love for her and look forward to an opportunity to sit down and look her in the eye and to talk to her. Now as for the comment that I am a rent-a-pastor (laughs)…listen, Peter, I’ve been called much worse, and you know, my position is this: I don’t mind being rented for the cause of Christ. I don’t mind being rented for God’s Truth, I don’t mind being used for God’s Truth…as a matter of fact I want to thank her for calling me a rent-a-pastor. And I’ll say to the Lord – you can rent me anytime you want. I don’t know why he would since he owns me, but I will do for whatever cause he would want me to be a part of …here I am Lord, I’m like Isaiah, [blah, blah, blah] as long as I am representing God’s Truth.
Peter, it’s really not about her; we’re just vessels to be used by the Lord. It is the cause…it is the truth of God that we represent that is so important. So if the Pam Spauldings of this world, I wouldn’t get into a shouting match with her, I wouldn’t visit her web site, or her Facebook or whatever and rail insult for insult…
Pam needs Jesus, when Pam meets the Lord that yearning for a member of the same sex will change…she’d probably make a fantastic mother [Um, no], and would enjoy having a husband who was born male – no Chaz Bono business – born male – and meet her man, and rock her world, in the name of the Lord.”
Peter: You’re right about the hatred, you expect that the hatred would come – this is a perversion movement.
Really, I have no idea what public event he and I attended at the same time. Also about that lunch. I’ll sit down with him along with NC House Thom Tillis, and some of the other Republicans and Democrats who voted to put this filthy Amendment One on the ballot — with video cameras rolling At this point the pols in favor of passing the ballot initiative don’t like defending their position on the amendment based on their political and social alignment with outlandish people like Rev. Wooden. They are now bound at the hip and I want to hear them publicly agree with or denounce arguments for passing an Amendment based on ridiculous, offensive scare tactics like unverified stories iPhones up the rectums of gay men, glory holes, gerbils and junk science that have nothing to do with “saving marriage.” That’s a lunch I’d attend.
24 Comments
I had enough Jesus in my early years to know it’s all made up. Every last bit of it.
So perhaps they’d like to try another tactic with me.
No doubt Pam that your newest stalker believe one session with his “holy member” will literally cure your healthy relationship with your wife.
No doubt he has nothing but a “Little Woody” and just suffers from a massive case of penis envy!
Another endorsement! I’ll never forget the letter he wrote to you a few years back. Your response was absolutely perfect.
Pam, I hope you remember to stop by Cindy Jacob’s house – so that she can undo your hysterectomy through her faith healing – before you visit Rev. Wooden’s house. Otherwise, all that “breeding” is gonna be pointless
What I find fascinating about these bigots is the extent of the sexual dysfunction in their lives. The phrases that closet case LaBarbarian uses — yearning, meet her man, rock her world — to me, all such obvious key words of a the self-image of the superstud who is so good in bed that women all fall at his feet. He so desperately wants to be that superstud — except that it’s a good bet that women rarely fall at his feet, and even when they do it’s somehow not so satisfying for him or for them.
But while idiots like LaBarbarian provide lots of data for research on sexual dysfunction, I’m really tired of being denied my rights just because of a bunch of sexually dissatisfied old men.
Half the men in the Church of God in Christ ain’t into women, so I don’t know where he thinks you should find a man to “rock your world”. I think Wooden is trying to hook up with you himself.
::::sigh:::: All of these misogynistic, Lesbiophobic wankers believe that they can cure us with their “Wand of Power” cure. Makes you want to get one of those Marlin Perkins animap tranq air rifles and dart them with Lupron, a chemical castrating agent that works for about a month.
Hmmm…a castrating sniper team of Lesbians……hmmmm
What an incredibly offensive thing to say… however, if some bigot said that to me in my face… far from getting mad, I probably would just start laughing hysterically. Those kinds of people are just insane.
I have to agree with Ryan
Yeah, but I don’t want that diseased womb back, lol.
Awwww, Pam, he says he loves you (yeah, I gagged as I typed that)
He also says he’s willing to be whatever you call him as long as he representing G-d’s truth. Now if only he’d re-read and understand the bible so he can learn G-d’s truth is not all about claiming one is in G-d’s high esteem in order to point out the perceived faults or errors of others. I think G-d’s pretty much capable of making his own determinations and would rather others not have the audacity to act in h=His stead.
These people are really sick. They spend their lives obsessed with sex – it must be like constantly peeking in peoples’ windows. So sleazy.
When I first heard about it, I figured that the guy has absolutely no clue what would happen to him. I think ‘buzz saw’ is somewhere in the general neighborhood.
They either don’t get any, don’t get enough of whatever would make them happy, or are complete confused about what would make them happy (probably they’re looking for the wrong kind of person).
I know it will never ever happen, but in my fantasy future, should NC vote for the constitutional amendment banning marriage equality, our Fierce Advocate President stands up on his two hind legs and announces that the Democratic National Convention won’t be in Charlotte but in Des Moines.
Like I said, it’s a fantasy future. I really hope the forces of light can beat back this bigotry at the ballot box. But — Charlotte, really?
Uterus envy. If Freud were female, how much diff life would be.
Yes please!
I’m always confused when people get upset with Xians being Homophobic, anti-women, etc. Come one guys! These people believe that the creator of the universe is a self confessed, multiple occasion, mass murdering maniac (who ironically they want to spent eternity in the loving embrace of) – being Homophobic is just so soft core – nowhere enough blood and guys spilled for their invisible spaghetti monster to really get his perv into.
It’s about damn time that someone calls out African American pastors like Patrick Wooden for their continued defense of patriarchy. Unfortunately, it’s absolutely certain that no one in the Democratic Party establishment has the guts to do so.
Everyone knows that black men are far superior to women of any race.
how disgusting. the one that’s going undercover is probably closeted, maybe both. I’ll bet either one of them could be stung by a PI or someone motivated to put forth a minimum amount of energy – more than either one of them is worth – their lives, or income streams.
I remember reading a satire article back in the 60′s, titled “Penis Pity” Heh.
Pam, I know you are happily married, but I have to observe that I find you are *much* cuter than that damp, pale person LaBarbera. He is actually quite icky, reminds me of the little pad thingy that soaks up the blood in the styro packages of chicken.
Don’t their “flocks” ever wonder about their perverse choices for obsession and the types of events they “infiltrate”; again, and again, and again?
I’ll bet these guys spend hours at home poring over, I mean researching, gay porn when they should be having family time. Closeted grifters peddling hate.
I thought preachers’ duty was to their church. What the heck are they doing lobbying in the legislature anyway? Guess TN needs to raise some revenue on those political organizations. Bet the folks of TN could use an increase in state revenues. I know the federal budget could.
Years ago, I recall seeing G. Gordon Liddy on a split-screen, along with (then Chastity) Bono, telling her “All you need to do is find a good man”.
I wanted to be able to interject, “Presumably not a convicted criminal, eh G. Gordon Felony”.