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In an interview for GQ with Devin Gordon, Chris Heath, and Alan Richman, GOP presidential clown car occupant Herman Cain continues to impress me with his qualifications to serve as court jester. Given the numerous allegations of sexual harassment and assault still roiling the entire campaign, leave it to pizza magnate Cain to reach out to the anti-vegetable, insecure male voters out there with this bit of business:
Chris Heath: What can you tell about a man by the type of pizza that he likes?
Herman Cain: [repeats the question aloud, then pauses for a long moment] The more toppings a man has on his pizza, I believe the more manly he is.
Chris Heath: Why is that?
Herman Cain: Because the more manly man is not afraid of abundance. [laughs]
Devin Gordon: Is that purely a meat question?
Herman Cain: A manly man don’t want it piled high with vegetables! He would call that a sissy pizza.
The lack of protein on a vegetable-laden pizza in Herman’s biology lesson means less testosterone, thus you’re a sissy, and we all know that’s half-way to “fagg*t-land.”
The jokes just keep on coming, because Cain was also asked to name what flavor of ice cream (is he an expert at this as well), each of his rivals should have named after them.
Devin Gordon: Let me ask you about your rivals. Recently, in response to a question about you being the new “flavor of the month,” you said you weren’t a flavor of the month, you were Häagen-Dazs black walnut, which “tastes good all the time.” If Mitt Romney was an ice cream flavor, what flavor would he be?
Herman Cain: Oh, just plain vanilla. [laughs]Are you guys really going to print this? I have learned that with my new status in the polls, any- and every thing that I say will show up somewhere. Do you guys really want to do this ice cream analogy?
Devin Gordon: We do. Rick Perry?
Herman Cain: Rick Perry: rocky road.
Devin Gordon: Michele Bachmann?
Herman Cain: Michele Bachmann… I’m not going to say it. I’m not going to say it.
Devin Gordon: Oh, come on!
Herman Cain: Tutti-frutti. I know I’m going to get in trouble!
He never did get around to Ron Paul or, thank god, Santorum. Cain just released his latest comedy advertisement, “Bold in Alabama,” illustrating his “man of the Southern people” vibe, rubbing shoulders with a lot of Alabamians (nearly all-white crowds) that flocked to his rallies there.
Touting his bold “9-9-9 Plan” for the renewal of local and state economies, Cain crisscrosses Alabama in the “Cain Train,” speaking with local folks, and reinforcing his, “I will never apologize for the greatness of America,” theme.
At every turn, the poll-surging candidate encounters throngs of cheering crowds and supporters from Alabamans of all stripes. As the Cain Train moves through the heart of Dixie, proves once again that Herman Cain is putting the ‘United’ back into “The United States of America”…..
Thankfully, it looks like Herman’s ride in the front seat of the Clown Car is about over. Via DKos Elections, news about the latest CNN poll:
ORC International for CNN. 11/11-13. Republican primary voters. ±4.5%. (10/14-16 results.)
Romney: 24 (26)
Gingrich: 22 (8)
Cain: 14 (25)
Perry: 12 (13)
Paul: 8 (9)
Bachmann: 6 (6)
Huntsman: 3 (1)
Santorum: 3 (3)
So based on these numbers, it looks as though we may have hit Peak Cain and are now witnessing Rise of the Newt. And these numbers probably aren’t a fluke: PPP says they’ll have a survey out this afternoon showing Newt Gingrich in the top spot, moving ahead of Herman Cain.
52 Comments
Another blog indicated that Häagen-Dazs black walnut was a limited time special flavor no longer around. The same should be true for Herman.
Having more toppings on a pizza simply means one is going to pay more for it (which I’m sure suits Mr. Cain) It hasn’t a thing to do with “manliness.” Being Chicago born and bred, I do not like Mr. Cain’s pizza anyway.
This sets a new record for the most stupid thing to ever come out of Herman Cain’s mouth. Jon Stewart’s going to have material for the next month after this.
The PTB can’t eve be bothered to put forward candidates that might be able to fool the american people. now they just put forward fools. I guess they think we have reached a point where we are either too dumb, too powerless or both to do anything about it.
I just saw the clip of this idiot on Lybia. What a jerk.
Never mind Cain’s pizza sucks from all reports Real Men don’t ask women if they want the job in order to get sex.
Do the Republican Candidates give Zombie Reagan as much head as they did in 2007? It seems Reagan is getting less head. Obama may be giving more Reagan head than the Republican Clowns.
Hold the pRESSES !!!
Didn’t anyone notice:
Huntsman has TRIPLED his poll #s
Newtie can’t say that.
If that’s not a Surge,,, ?
Some one once told me that some pizzas are ordered with pineapple. Not that I believe it, but did Cain have any bon mots about that?
Cain went from 25 to 14 in just one week and this scandal broke a few weeks ago this gives us information as to how long it takes for a story to get out about a second tier GOPer’s sex scandal and for that information to start hitting the polls.
I expect Cain to drop further as the news spreads further into the public.
Pineapple Pizza is Delicious.
…and Nutritious.
Pineapple pizza is good with spinach and any hot pepper plus one meat sausage or pepperoni I prefer a wheat bread crust.
It is funny they ask a pizza guy questions about what ice cream flavor’s the other candidates are. The answers to the questions seemed to pat I suspect they were known in advance.
Ice Cream was chosen instead of pizza because more people know ice cream flavors than the number of people who know good pizza.
Prove it.
Sounds completely disgusting to me.
Some one once told me that some pizzas are ordered with pineapple.
Canadian Bacon is good with it so is real bacon try brown sugar directly on the pineapple after you bake it.
I eat pizza once or twice/year. Wouldn’t think of sullying it with a pollutant like pineapple. Might as well put maple syrup on it.
You anticipated my 15.
When I have a decadent brunch, like pain perdue and bacon, I insist that the salties get served on a separate plate from the sweeties.
Cain seems to be getting a pass from the MSM he’s getting ice cream questions from the press when Bill Clinton at this point was in his scandal was dodging the Press. Its about time the Dems start saying the media is controlled by the GOP.
It’s Chris who should be getting the heat for making this discussion part of a political interview. Really repulsive. Reminds me of the efforts to pit Hillary against Liddy Dole. Jeeeeze…
Ok maybe you would not like pineapple pizza to each their own. Still all pizza blog reports suggest Cain’s pizza sucks no matter what you try. But if you want good pizza come to Chicago:)
I believe your “Proof” is coming in the form of a FDL testimonial above from:
ThingsComeUndone November 14th, 2011 at 5:56 pm
However, only your mouth, not your keyboard, can provide Proof, beyond a reasonable doubt.
Here are my instructions. If you live in California or Hawaii, no problem. A delicious Pineapple Pizza could be in walking distance and is certainly a short car trip away. Do not go to Godfather’s, Dominoes or any of the other horrible sources. All their pizzas tastes like cardboard and no amount of pineapple can cure it.
If you live in any State within 2 or 3 states of Kansas you may have a problem & should consider
suicidemoving.GQ & political interview? I know nothing about GQ except the name, but, in my prejudiced ignorance, it sounds about right for GQ to do this kind of lowbrow coverage.
Those who think highly of GQ, show me the error of my ways.
Mid-Hudson, but not in the way that Sully Sullenberger experienced it.
eCHAN,
Try it with b-b-q chicken.
Would I lie to you…
I have certainly enjoyed pineapple aplenty on my pizza…sort of a luau experience. But your warning definitely made me start counting on my fingers how many states lie betwn me and KS…It’s too close for comfort.;)
There will be a new x-mas special this year, “The Gingrich That Stole the Nomination”. There is just no way that the Republican base is going to nominate a Mormon. They will however nominate moron. As I have proclaimed in the recent past, if the Rep base is going to hold their nose and vote for someone they will vote for one of their own, White, Southern, Christian male.
Not like it matters, we are still going to get either one of these idiots or Obummer.
Prejudiced ignorance works for me everytime…never know where a little wisdom will pop up.
You never had a Hawaiian Pizza??? Ham and pineapple? You’re missing out!
I live in PA and it’s still too close for comfort, and I’m not a woman.
Pretty close, isn’t it?
See #26 re. this example. I really do not enjoy/like Dennis Miller at all. No cause to count the ways he annoys me and how I find him wrong. On today, however, he really got it right as he went after Penn State. He spared no words for McQ, Sand…or JoePa. I felt better just listening to him cut thru the morass of evil. It was clearly a zero tolerance outbreak. Probably something we all needed.
How would I know if you lie to me if you can’t spell my name right.
I lived in Hawaii and never ate one! I’m in eCAHN’s corner on the pineapple. However, greasy meats are terribly distracting for me. Veggie Pizzas rule!*
*I’ve devoted a great deal of my life into the search for the highly elusive “Perfect Pizza”
Heh. Achieved just the culture/food war I provoked for. Have at it!
“Real Men” eat whatever they want and tell anyone who objects to fuck off. What a douche.
Waah? Real men don’t get defensive. Tell me it ain’t so.
I dunno how they can call that a Hawaiian Pizza. You want a real Hawaiian Pizza, make ‘um with lu’au leaf and pork.
Or, mo’ bettah, skip the pizza and go grab one laulau plate lunch! With rice and mac salad!
Pineapple pizza. *SHAKES HEAD* What a way to destroy a wonderful breakfast food…
Speaking of “Greasy Meat”… (nonplussed November 14th, 2011 at 6:38 pm )
One of the CC geniuses opined a few nights back that Cain is the only candidate who means his own, when he instructs the pizza waitress to “Hold the Sausage”.
Would you mind to talking to my Medico? I’m afraid to tell her anything of the sort! She and her posse are relentless, one of her compatriots even pursued me from my old provider to the VA. I believe that I am allergic to MDs, the more of them I see, the worse off I am supposed to be. Felt fine before I ever saw the first one. Rather conclusive evidence, I submit…
“go grab one laulau plate lunch”
with two scoop rice
And if you no like the mac salad, can get three scoop rice! Gotta pay extra for poi though, cause STILL get shortages. Dang weather screwing up the growing season…
OMG please post this video on Cain on libya
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/cain-talks-libya-pulls-perry
As a vegetarian of 33 years who loves pizza piled high with vegetables, I now have a sudden, intense desire to punch Herman Cain squarely in his face. But if I had only one wish that could be granted, it would be that Hattie McDaniel, a woman who was a credit to the entire human race, come back to earth just long enough to administer the appropriate smack-down to Cain and put him in his proper place once and for all.
That interview was insane…..and I mean it, INSANE!!!
For all the pizza lovers: The best pizza in the country is to be found at “Uno’s” & “Due’s” in Chicago…the original, not the franchises that are to be found in numerous cities. The best: just cheese & sausage and be sure to order a salad with it. Yummy. I live in California now and we have nothing like it here. The only pizza that is worthwhile, but not like Uno’s and Due’s is North Beach Pizza in San Francisco.
Like PETA says, meat can cause impotence.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7M1lJ7d8Rg
Go vegan!
I’m still awaiting comment from Little Richard.
“Sissy pizza”…
.
.
.
!
..
gets this many responses, and so quickly?
[ insertTwain&/orVonnegutish rejoinder, here ]
When I was a kid growing up in Buffalo, we ordered double cheese with pepperoni from Leonardi’s. Their double cheese was like quintuple cheese from other pizzerias. Even when their quality went down, it was like quadruple cheese. Buffalo pizza had crust that was thicker than New York pizza, but thinner than Chicago pizza. It also had thick little pepperonis that curled up around the edges, leaving little pools of grease in the middle. There was nothing like it.
Other toppings besides pepperoni and extra cheese…
Meat: I like bacon and BBQ chicken. Sausage is OK, but not my favorite. I don’t like anchovies, but I can at least understand other people putting them on pizza.
Veggies: Onions, green peppers, and mushrooms are cool. I don’t like olives, but again, I can at least understand other people putting them on pizza.
Pineapple is an atrocity against pizza!
With riveting questions like this from the media it’s a wonder this country is headed off a cliff.
sissy pizza with all those queer veggies. wow. give him a mushroom enema, please.
Wasn’t quite what I had in mind as I also am on a strict diet for high cholesterol and high blood pressure. What I meant is that “real men” (and real women) eat what they like and not what others tell them they should like.
That’s a really good point. The next least relevant question I could come up with is “what color socks are you wearing?”
I suspect Wolf Blitzer’s been waiting to spring that one his entire life. After all, it’s not like he has anything better to do.
The man knows nothing of pizza. He’s just a businessman and that’s all. I’ve had pizza from 3 continents, 9 countries with just about everything you can think of. It’s a food stuff and that’s it. Some are beautiful and some are road kill. And the only thing true about all meat pizza that’s piled high is it can lead to some clogged arteries.
The best pizza I’ve ever had?
A small hand tossed, light fluffy plain yeast dough topped with hot cappicola that’s shredded and soaked in Tabasco sauce over night, goat cheese and whole black olives with some fresh basil and a drizzel of evoo and tossed in to a hardwood fired beehive oven several hundred years old in Treste Italy. Very basic, very beautiful. …I miss it dearly.
‘Bold in Alabama’ (0.0) uh…it’s Alabama and he’s black…and running FOR president? I would think he would be running FOR the state line. Dang, he’s thick as a brick.