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I never heard a peep on the grapevine about Meredith Baxter being gay. 
Congrats for coming out — at any age. And she decided to do so just as the Enquirer and Perez were on the case. Kudos for just breaking free.
Big revelation on this morning's Today show: Meredith Baxter is gay. “I'm a lesbian,” she told Matt Lauer. “Some people would say, well, you're living a lie and, you know, the truth is – not at all. This has only been the past 7 years,” said Baxter, 62, explaining that she's “extraordinarily happy.” And the famous Family Ties mom says it sheds some light on her three previous marriages (which resulted in five kids).
“I understand why I had the issues I had earlier in my life. I had difficulty connecting with men.”She added, “I got involved with someone I never expected to get involved with,” she said, citing Nancy Locke, a general contractor she met four years ago and with whom she lives a “very out life with in Los Angeles.”
32 Comments
That’s terrificI suppose she’ll face some criticism for not coming out sooner, but the truth is that she’s not a huge star at the level that Ellen or Rosie were when they were closeted in Hollywood, and it’s probable that nobody asked.
Hopefully, her classy exit from the closet will inspire others to follow her lead when sleazemongers like Perez come calling. She and Neil Patrick Harris show us the way to go. Good for her.
Welcome home Meredith!
heheIt’s been known for years – good for her!
As an aside…I respect an individual’s right to choose whatever identity works best for them. However, one thing that I do question is whether or not she actually is, in the strictest sense, a “lesbian.”
I sometimes worry that many celebrities start to accept the socially imposed binary that one is either gay or straight. Isn’t it entriely possible that she is bi and only late in life come to terms with her attraction to women? Was she never really attracted to men?
I think that not enough time is spent really addressing the subject of bisexuality especially in the media. Kinsey suggested that bisexuality is probably the norm for our speicies. Despite this, many people are almost pressured to identify as being exclusively heterosexual or homosexual. That spectrum inbetween gets overlooked.
You don’t always acknowledge it to yourself earlierI didn’t face the issue til the day before my 45th birthday. My birthday present to myself was a date with a woman.
I don’t think that is the caseI think that in many womens’ cases, because women are not as sexually driven, they can shove their REAL desires back and continue living a life that is easier and approved of.
Whereas you don’t see that as much with men, because we have such a sexual drive, it isn’t as easy for us to not act on our desires.
That’s my thoughts on the subject of why we see many women coming out late in life, and we don’t see that as much with men.
In psychological shorthand ……as I do not know what lesbians use themselves. Some are deemed LUG's some LAM's. Thats Lesbian until (College)Graduation… and Lesbian After Menopause.I would venture many are bi, and that is one reason by BIness needs to be emphasized as a normal happy state. They can love anyone!…but many are truly 'suppressed' lesbians, especially if there is no history of het activities/inclinations.Congrats. We need all the CELEBS we can get OUT LOUD and PROUD!
I am going to take her at her wordif she says shes a lesbian, than she’s a lesbian. Of course, if she later says she’s bi I’ll take her at that too.
She is a LesbianShe, by her own account, forms the most stable emotional attatchements to women. You don’t have a gag at the merest whiff of testosterone to be a Lesbian
An ability to have sex with men is not the defining criteria for bisexuality.
I’ll do the same…as i said, she is free to identify however she chooses.
But I do wonder about the effect of living in a social/media environment that does not give one much room to make a bisexual identification. Howmany people have we seen that do make that identification get told that, no, they are actually gay just in denial?
We’ve seen instances of people who’ve come out later in life say that they loved their previous spouses, and were attracted to to their wives/husbands at the time.
Again, this is just something to think about.
I had always hoped so!Ever since Family Ties!
And I will never criticize her for coming out later in life. As long as she gets happy!
Baxter BirneyWasn’t she once married to that hottie David Birney and didn’t they have a short-lived TV show about mixed marriage called Bridget and Bernie? I wonder if he’s gay, too? :-)
In her own words …
I choose to respect Meredithand grant that she knows herself better than I can ever know her. If she says she is a lesbian, then she is a lesbian.
Purity Tests?I do not care for purity tests. The biggest problems that create pressures within the GLBT communities are the purity tests.
She says she is lez, great. That is all that is necessary.
Baxter & My WifeMy wife just reminded me of the time she and Meredith got into an argument at Starbucks over Meredith’s gazillion pump soy chai drink. Apparently Baxter went through the drive thru & ordered her drink but when she thought it wasn’t made incorrectly, she stormed in and screamed at my wife (who was a *$ manager at the time). Some loud words and gestures were exchanged but now I think my wife has a bit more compassion for her — life is hard when you don’t know why you’re so freaking angry all of the time!
My criticism of Mrs. Keaton err. BaxterWhy make a non-story a 10 minute interview with Matt Lauer? While I applaud her for publicly coming out, it seems more manufactured to me based on what I saw this morning. Whatever happened to the days when someone could publicly come out via a passing comment in a magazine article or at a rally or celebrity gossip show like Hollywood Extra?
This is how it came across to me this morning:
Matt: So what do you want to announce?
Meridith: My fellow Americans, it has been a trying time the last few years. And some of you may have heard some rumors about me. Please, maintain order and do not panic. I don’t want to hear of rioting in the streets, or looting of Walmart upon the news that I’m about to reveal to you.
I’m a Lesbian. I discovered this one day quite by accident while looking in the mirror but did not do anything initially. I told a few close friends at first but since going on an Olivia Cruise it has since metastasized and is starting to spread to the tabloid region of my life as a celebrity.
Please, everyone, remain calm. Thank you, and God Bless.
Matt: Umm, thank you? In other news, The “Today” show has resorted to using ‘filler’ for dead air time.
Wonder what Alex P. Keaton would have to say, lolGood on Meredith though…I always had a feeling she was family.
She’s in a longterm, committed lesbian relationship…That’s all that matters to her, I would guess!
I dunno…But it would be nice to speculate what Alex would be doing… would he have served in Little Georgie’s WH gang of thieves and criminals?
One of my most favourite episodes is when Alex was in college and he was on staff at a suicide hotline. I think that day he learned a little humility and lost alot of his arrogance.
I think it’s great they took almost 10 minutesto very calmly talk about her story. How can this not be good? And besides, I think this clip should be viewed with an eye towards what type of tv program this is. This is the kind of thing show that lets fans have a peek into the personal lives of celebrities. I’m delighted that they could spent time talking about something timely and relevant, and the discerning viewer would have learned a lot of important things like
* when you’re raised in a homophobic setting, you may not realize you’re gay
* you may have some internalized homophobia resulting from your upbringing, and that can affect your relationships
* coming out doesn’t HAVE to be a planet-killer issue. it can be a non-issue in loving families.
* non-political people who have a true heart will sometimes willingly step into the zone of discomfort because they know it is the right thing to do.
win. win. win. i loved it.
Don’t forget the series “Family”She played the eldest sister Nancy on one of the best series of the 70s. I never even got a blip on my gayday screen. Watching her interview with Lauer, I can see both the relief and the apprehension on her face. She was extremely articulate and brave. GOOD for her!
10-80-10That’s always been my belief, 10% are truly hetrosexual, 80% bi-sexual and 10% homosexual.
Armchair Psychological Analysis HereI watched both the video of the Today Show and heard the Sirius OutQ Frank DeCaro interview and based on those, I’d have to say her self-identification as “lesbian” makes sense. Unlike, say, Anne Heche, who simply proved that she would sleep with anyone to advance her career – but at the same time has never claimed to be “ex-gay” or “going through a phase” when she was with Ellen – Baxter’s demeanor says to me that she has finally accepted a truth she denied for years.
When Family Ties was on I was never a fan – she was very good in her role, but when she was interviewed I always found a coldness, a reserve I simply didn’t like. Certainly she is a private person, which could impact her public persona (apparently she’s the only actress in Hollywood who never had a publicist), but there was something more. Having seen her today, there is a relaxation, a comfort level with herself that was missing previously. As someone who came out relatively late (at 33) I totally identified with it – it is the feeling that one gets when the albatross of denial and self-closeting is removed.
I knew…
But I only knew after she sat about 4 feet from me and my GF at Margaret Cho show at TheDinah Shore weekend with her GF in her lap, oh, and seeing them kiss at either Lady Gaga or Katy Perry show.. funny thing is, I didn’t recognize her, thought I recognized her GF, and asked her if I had seen her speak someplace… my GF asked what I asked Meredith’s GF and I was clueless that it was her. A friend sent a pic of them sitting in front of us :)
Yes, I remember (vaguely) the show Bridget Loves BernieAccording to the Wikipedia article, it was even rated #5 among viewers, but was canceled due to hate mail objecting to the inter-religious content of the show.
Baxter criticized Wanda Syke’s coming out as oppurtunisticoh no you didn’t!!!1
That’s because we all had crushes on Kristy McNicholWho had eyes for anybody else on that show?
I get your pointI just think it could have been handled much better. I think the right thing to do would have been to allow the tabloids to print their “outing” story and for her to simply respond, “So? Why is this considered “newsworthy”?” It just makes me think that A) there’s some other dirt she’s trying to hide by grabbing the headlines herself, or as a lot of my co-workers said, “She must be getting ready to sell a book.”
She should let somebody else tell HER story first?I don’t think so. I think that’s HER story. She gets to tell it. If somebody is forcing her hand — and somebody is — then I don’t see what choice she had. Letting other people make decisions about her life is definitely not one of the choices.
Every question you have is answered in the actual interview. For instance, it’s considered newsworthy because Baxter played a beloved TV mom and now she’s a lesbian. That seems pretty self-explanatory to me.
And when were the days when any entertainer ever came out with a passing comment? Like who? Rock Hudson? Neil Patrick Harris? Ellen DeGeneres? Adam Lambert? Rosie O’Donnell? That has simply never happened. With anybody.
I’m not so convinced that a woman who has always guarded her privacy, who had to be forced to publicly acknowledge her sexuality, and who was clearly uncomfortable throughout the interview where she did, is actually a conniving, money-driven, calculating fraud. I’m pretty sure she’s really someone who would prefer this didn’t have to happen.
But if she ever does write a book, what a valuable tool that would be for other women in her position. How empowering that would be for her. What a great read that book would have to be. If she ever does write it, I hope it tops all the bestseller lists and makes her millions of dollars. I wouldn’t begrudge her a penny.
As for the LUG/LAM thangI consider myself a “Late bloomer!” – of course those who identify as Lesbian from the moment of first breath do look down on ladies like me…. but we’re HERE finally and thank the universe for it!!!
I lived soft butch/tom boy my whole life…. got molested at 12 by a guy and followed the wrong path for some time. Wed the first man who said he cared about me since I had self esteem issues from the molestation and confusion. Best thing was having a wonderful daughter, but the more things changed in the relationship….the more I realized, I was wasn’t being ME.
So….yes I divorced him, gave myself time to be truly me, and now I have a great woman at my side and I at hers. And I can look back and SEE why I had crushes on Uhura from Star Trek, Kristy McNichol…etc….I was there but not seeing myself. Even one of my best friends told me it was about time! LOL
I think Ms. Baxter did the right thing to beat the tabloids to the punch – it is her life and she has reclaimed herself.
Definitely BraveI wrote a novel about a woman coming out late-in-life called Seeking Sara Summers. For these women it isn’t about getting their 15 minutes of fame (a criticism of Meredith Baxter on another site), it’s about getting a life. I think it takes a tremendous amount of courage to simply be who you are.